Poopy Diapers and Burp Rags

Sleepless

2008-03-26T12:11:00.003-07:00

I was thinking lastnight a lot about certain things of my life. I couldn't sleep, which seems to be becoming a more constant pattern in my life. I was laying there staring at the ceiling, watching the ceiling fan, and listening to noises from the city outside. I live by a fire station and a hospital, so a lot of the night I can hear sirens and helicopters. It usually doesn't bother me, but on nights when I am unable to fall asleep, it can become quite distracting. Lastnight, Jonathan was unable to fall asleep as well. He kept crying and screaming that he was scared. Usually, if I leave him be, he will fall asleep. Lastnight was different, he screamed in terror and was afraid, I could tell by the way he was dripping with sweat that something wasn't right in his little world. When I went to his bedroom, he sat up and asked if he could get out of bed. I told him no, but I would lay with him until he fell asleep. A few minutes later, he asked if we could sing. Sure. He said he wanted to sing the "ABC's" so we did. Eight times. Then he wanted to sing the "Car's Song" (Life is a Highway) so we tried...of course, I made up some of the words, but we sang that....three times. Then I told him he needed to go to sleep, close your eyes.....after twelve times of James Taylor's song "Close Your Eyes" he finally fell asleep. Each time I was done, he would whisper "Close Eyes song again...."

So...

2008-03-25T11:29:00.004-07:00

A lot has been going on. I know, I haven't updated this forever. Perhaps that should be the new title..."The Blog I Never Update." I've lost touch! Sorry guys! Well, I was recently reading through some of my posts, and I was sad at how much I haven't accomplished. I have a tendancy to make goals, but never follow through. It's not that my goals are unattainable, I just have a problem with following through! I actually make goals that are quite achievable, which only magnifies the disappointment when it's not reached. I never went to grad school. I never lost the weight. I never made anything for anyone. I never memorized scripture, or learned how to play the guitar....

Here are some things that have been keeping me busy...I've been working on potty training Jonathan. Again. He was completely potty trained, until I moved him to another daycare, and they didn't do potty training until the next class up. So, he went back into a diaper. We are working on that again. I have been busy doing "mommy things." I am a damn good mommy. I started a new job, at a new school district, and I am a damn good teacher. I moved in with my brother...that's all I will say about that. Let's just say my conflict/resolution skills are increasing.

Recently, I've gotten in touch with some people from my past. It's been nice getting to know each other. I won't go into details about that yet.

Um...ok, that's all I have for now. Actually there is a lot more, but I just don't feel like typing it all...hope you all are well.

A new pic...well, it's kinda old...

2007-11-21T13:24:00.000-07:00

Wow it's been like...a year already

2007-11-21T13:18:00.001-07:00

I can't believe I have only posted less then 10 times since Jonathan's last birthday. Well, he just turned two years old on the 2nd. I now own a toddler...which is weird. He amazes me every day. I am in the process of moving right now, which is always a difficult task. I am so tired of moving. I really am. I promise I will post more...this time I mean it.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone....

Thrifty...isn't that spelled with an "E"??

2007-05-16T13:46:00.000-07:00

(That's an inside joke for my friend Lori...!!)

Ok, so in an attempt to get out of debt and stop spending so much money, I made a comittment to not buy anything brand new until further notice (ok, except for underwear...and diapers...) In my quest for financial freedom I found a glorious money saving opportunity...every other Saturday the Goodwill has 50% off day, where everything in the store is half off...! The store opens up at 7am, and by 6:45 there is a line wrapped around the store. It is like the day after Thanksgiving...and I love it. Here are some of the awesome deals I have come across...some of the actual prices are estimated, but the Goodwill prices are what I paid...

1. Large area rug (I've been eyeballing it at Target for a few months)...Target price $70.00...Goodwill price $15.00 (oh, and I got the matching runner for $10.00)

2. American Eagle Jeans Regular price $30.00+...Goodwill price $4.00

3. Gap jean capri's Regular price $30.00...Goodwill price $1.50

4. 3 pairs of Old Navy Jeans Regular price $25.00...Goodwill price $1.50 each
5. Hollister T-shirt Regular price $30.00...Goodwill price $1.00

6. 2 American Eagle T-shirts Regular price $20.00...Goodwill price $1.00 each

7. Pair of Croc's Regular price $30.00...Goodwill price $3.50 (ok, they are bright blue...but they are oh so comfortable...)

8. Pair of Nine West Black Boots Regular price $40.00+...Goodwill price $4.00

9. FisherPrice Corn Popper (Toy) Regular Price $10.00...Goodwill price $1.00

10. LeapFrog Alphabet Drum Regular Price $20.00+...Goodwill price $1.50

11. LeapFrog Alphabet Ball Regular price $20.00+...Goodwill price $1.50

12. Apples to Apples card game(still in plastic) Regular Price $25.00...Goodwill price $1.50

Ok, I'm bored...I've gotten a lot more stuff...but I'm just tired of typing it all out...

call me cheap, call me a tightwad, I don't care...Everything I've gotten looks brand new, and practically is...so judge me, I don't care...I've spent less than you have...!

Nothing Really

2007-04-25T13:40:00.000-07:00

So, it's been a long time since I've blogged, I don't even think anyone reads this anymore. Which, is fine by me! I was scrolling through some of the archives yesterday and it's amazing what has gone on in life since I first started blogging. Not that I really ever have anything important to say, but there was a lot of stuff! Life has been great lately. I love where I am. It's great. Jonathan is getting so big, I can't believe he is already a year and a half old! He makes me laugh so much: The other day I was getting ready to change his diaper, and I asked him to go into the other room and get me a diaper, not really knowing what he would do...to my surprise, he got up, went into the other room where I keep the diapers and started rummaging around! Well, a few minutes had gone by and I was wondering where he was when all of the sudden he came back into the room carrying a giant jumbo pack of diapers...! He brought the entire package instead of just one, and I started laughing so hard, then he started laughing too, and it was a great moment.

I started running again, it's part of my "28x28 plan" 28 things I want to accomplish before I turn 28 (August 10th!! Look for a gift list later...just kidding! I will be hosting a birthday bash though...as I have never really had a birthday party!) Look for the plan later too or here to go to my myspace profile and read it on my blog there...I always say that, but then never post anything for like 2 months...well folks, that is about to change. Up until now, I havn't had a computer as Jason took it when he left, however, I recently ordered one from Dell! Dude, I'm getting a Dell! (Whatever happened to that guy?) So, I know it's not the nicest or trendiest computer, but at last I will feel like part of society again! Jason actually helped me find a good deal on a laptop they were selling. Woo Hoo. I'm stoked.

Another part of my 28x28 plan is to get out of my shell (yes, as my friend Anthony put it...I was born a tortoise...it's not something I really like to talk about...so let's just leave it at that) and get out and do things more. I think I'm doing pretty good with this, and I have met some really awesome people that I love hanging out with! The past few months has been a blast! So, thank you all!

Anyway, that should about do it...until next time...

Oh, Jonathan has posted a few pics on his blog as well...check him out.

I suck at blogging...

2007-04-12T11:38:00.000-07:00

So here are some pics instead...

Jonathan loves spending time with his Uncle Cory, and he also will put just about anything on his head and call it a hat...

OH MY

2007-01-28T17:02:00.000-07:00

Has it really been that long since I have blogged? I would really love to do it more often...and post pictures everyday of my beautiful son...but I just can't! Hopefully I will be able to get a computer soon...but I'm not holding my breath. Things have been really crazy lately. The school I work for is...well, going under, yet I've decided to honor my contract...even though they have not honored theirs. As in: paycuts and lay offs. I will praise God when I can work in a school close to home next year. I'm just losing too much time with my kid. The paycut is really what is killing me, as if I wasn't already living paycheck to paycheck (which I HATE...) So, I don't know how, but we'll make it. God is faithful.
Jonathan is just growing like a weed. Seriously. I never really understood that phrase, but I'm seeing firsthand. He is so smart. He knows many signs now, and uses them all the time. Some of his favorites are "helicopter" (which seems to not only include helicopters but birds and airplanes as well...) and "dog." He now tells me when to change his diaper as in he'll point to his booty and say "poop...uh oh..." and I have learned that is my cue. Potty training is coming soon. He is so beautiful and I love his hugs and kisses...he cracks me up too, like today he was pretending to be a dog...and he was crawling around and barking, and even crawled over to the dogs' bowls and pretended to eat from it. It was hilarious. His walking is getting better too...although now he is getting more daring, which has included him taking many falls...and hitting his head bunches. I still can't believe I get to be this kid's mom. It's awesome.
Personally, things are going ok. STILL trying to get the last few things unpacked...! I am putting off school until I can get a computer, so that is a bummer, but it's much better to wait I think.

Well, it's off to church, if I'm late Jonathan gets mad because his girlfriend Emily will be waiting (see the previous post "Emily, her name rolls off my tongue....not sure which date it is, and I don't have time to look it up right now...!!) They adore each other, and will just sit and stare and smile. Jonathan always greets her with a kiss and they try to hold hands and walk (even though neither one is coordinated enough to pull this off, they still try!)

Ok, I promis some time this week there will be pictures on here...and on Jonathan's as well...he will have a lot to say...as a matter of fact, he is never quiet anymore...!

Hey...note to Jenn...email me so I know how to get in touch with you!! I've been wanting to talk to you, but I lost your contact info!!!! Love you!

NAU

2006-12-02T16:40:00.000-07:00

Well, I have applied for grad school. A little scary. Money will be tight, but I want to get it out of the way before Jonathan gets any bigger, and busier. I decided to go to Northern Arizona University. It is in Flagstaff, but they have a great distance learning program where I can take most of my classes here in the valley, or online. Now all I need is a computer! I also decided to go into Early Childhood, that way I can use my degree if I go ahead and decide to open up a preschool like I've been thinking about doing for a few years.

We have been busy...still unpacking and what not. It's a slow process.

My mom's husband Marty has become very sick, we don't really know what is wrong with him, and I know she doesn't want a lot of details out, but he is in the ICU, and from what the doctors say, he will be there for at least a month. Please pray for her during this time, because with him unconscious (how do you spell that word?) in the ICU, that means no income...and plus, it's never fun when a family member is so sick.

Things with my job are currently up in the air. It's been a very stressful year. I can't really go into the details because it would just seem like an angry employee lashing out at their employer...it's just bad. I can't wait for this school year to be over. I have no joy in it this year. But I love the kids, and I go to work for them...no one else!

Church is going great. I've met a lot of really great people who have been a good support system for me. I have started going to another church, and I got involved teaching a 10th grade girls Life Group. It's been challenging, and fun. Back in October the youth group went on "Destination Zero" a trip modeled after "The Amazing Race." The goal was to become as much of a "zero" you could while serving others. We were split up into teams, and we would have to solve puzzles, which would lead us to our missions...which were service projects all over the valley...it was fun...and can I just say, our team won? woo hoo! Our team was so awesome, and the kids in the group were amazing. They were in it to serve, not to win, and I think that is what made all the difference. It was a great time...although it made me feel really old.

Well, this has been a long post, I just don't get to do this as much as I would like....sorry...but thanks for reading...

Jonathan's Birthday...

2006-11-23T19:13:00.000-07:00

Here we are at Jonathan's birthday party...I can't seem to remember exactly what we were so excited about...!!

Thanksgiving

2006-11-23T18:55:00.000-07:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

I know it has been a long time since I have blogged, and I am sorry. I don't have a computer, so it makes it a little difficult...I am taking donations for one though...ha! Today was a wonderful day spent with my mom, her husband, his daughter, my brother and Jonathan. It was a very good day. My mom is an excellent cook, and I really missed being away from her all those years.

I know I have a lot to be thankful for, and I just wanted to reflect over the past year, I won't blog about it, because it's not worth it. I learned a lot about others, relationships, motherhood, myself and God. Too many questions have been left unanswered, and I'm asking God to give me peace about it. There is still anger and hurt in my life, and I'm trying desperately to let it all go.

To all you single mothers out there, you are amazing. I don't know how you do it. As of tomorrow I will have been a single mother for a year. It is so difficult...so emotional and so draining. How do you balance your lives? There are days when I feel like I'm barely hanging on. There are days when I feel like I've let go...and I'm falling...and failing. If you know a single mother...give her a hug. Ask her if there is anything you can do for her...even it's just watching her children for and hour so she can go get a haircut. The littlest things make the biggest impact. Trust me. Actually, it's not just single mothers...if you know a single mother or father...I have met a lot of really great single dads who are just as worn out...!

A big thank you to all who have made this year a little better for me...

what?

2006-11-02T16:14:00.000-07:00

where have i been?

don't know...

ha...

ok, more later...i'm still alive...

Important events in today's history....

2006-09-25T17:44:00.000-07:00

September 25th

1818: First human blood transfusion
1907: New Zealand becomes a dominion within the British Empire
1954: Papa' Doc Duvalier becomes the President of Haiti
1957: US National Guard deployed in Little Rock, USA, to enforce desegregation in schools
1972: Norway votes not to join the European Community

Nothing too exciting...

Arizona's Newest Teacher...

2006-09-18T21:22:00.000-07:00

After 2 1/2 years of arguing with the Arizona Department of Education, I am now a certified teacher!! Woot Woot!!! I got my official teaching certificate in the mail this weekend...

more thoughts

2006-09-11T22:34:00.000-07:00

I think I should clarify my post from yesterday.

I did not mean for it to sound like I was coming down on anyone...I was just trying to make a point that we have issues in our lives that we should maybe deal with before coming down on someone else, or telling someone else how to live, especially when people are going through difficult times in their lives.

Second, there was nothing against Jason in anger having to do with him spending time with Jonathan every other weekend. I tried to make it clear that yes, I know Jonathan needs time with his father...I just don't like being away from my kid. I am sure many mothers out there can understand how I feel and relate to what I am saying. I am not one of those mothers who likes being away from their child for an extended period of time, like some are...even if it is just a weekend.

From what I see so far, Jason is coming around to being a very good father. Jonathan loves him very much and lights up whenever he sees Jason. It makes me happy to see the bond they are forming. I am also happy to say that Jason and I are stepping in the right direction to bringing up Jonathan in seperate homes but united at the same time. It is nice to be "getting along" again.

thoughts

2006-09-09T21:55:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I haven't been around in a long while. School started again, and then I was sick, and it just seems as though time is flying. Jonathan is already 10 months old, I just can't believe it. He is with his dad this weekend, which I have decided to post my true feelings on...afterall, this is MY blog.

Now, I have taken a lot of...ahem...crap over the past year. Some of it has come from people who have no idea what is going on...and some of it has come from women who have NO idea how to be mothers...example: one who gave her kids up for adoption, trying to tell me how to be a Godly mother...now, I do not know what the circumstances were behind that, but I just don't think that this certain person has any credibility as far as motherhood goes at this point to be giving me advice. The second woman giving me "Godly" advice on how to be a mother...well, let's just say God isn't evident in her life, and her children are terrors..among other things. But, whatever works for you. Another gentleman trying to tell me not to get a divorce because it isn't the right choice, when in fact he is divorced...and living a much better life thanks to his "new" wife who lives a much better life$tyle than what he wa$ u$ed to...if you catch my drift. Looks like getting a divorce really worked out for him.

I know I am doing a darn good job raising Jonathan, he is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I have spent countless hours awake at night taking care of him, and running him to the doctor, and changing diapers, and playing and cuddeling...NOT that I'm complaining, because I most certainly am not...this is the best "job" I have ever had! I just never imagined I would be forced into a situation where I would have to parent on my own. It really sucks. Again, this is my blog...so I can say whatever I want...if you don't like it...don't read it, there are millions of other blogs out there you can read. I'm tired of feeling like I am the only one with respsonsiblity after this whole divorce...I mean, I now have a child and two dogs...ok, obviously the child is much more important, but it seems like the other party simply got to walk away, no strings attached. Jason and I are getting along much better, and we have recently changed the parenting time, so he now gets to be with Jonathan every other weekend...which to be honest with you...I hate it. I do, I really hate it. I don't like being away from Jonathan. At all. I absolutely hate the fact that just because Jason walked away, I have to sacrifice time with my kid. It's not fair. Some of you might be saying...well, it's not fair to Jason that he only gets to see Jonathan every other weekend...well, I have one thing to say to that...Jason is the one who decided to leave...instead of work on things and stick it out through the tough times, he wanted out, so he got just what he wanted. Please don't comment on by blog things like "it's important for jonathan to know his father..." and other stuff like that...yes, I am aware of this, that is why I decided to work with Jason to change the parenting time...but it still doesn't change how I FEEL.

I HATE being without Jonathan. I don't even like to go to work and leave him with the babysitter...let alone for a whole weekend. It totally sucks not being able to wake up to his smiling face and usually stinky diaper! I hate not being able to rock him to sleep, or read him a story at night and play under the covers. Maybe down the road, I will enjoy this time to myself, but right now, I can't stand it, and I really don't think it's fair. (yes, I know...life's not fair...save your comments...)

Jason and I have been getting along nicely. We have both decided that the only way this is going to work is if we do. It has been nice working together on this. There have been some major glitches along the way, but that is to be expected. I still think it stinks that we are going to have to still be "attached" for the rest of our lives. There will never be such a thing as a clean break, and that is very hard for me. No, I'm not saying that I would like to get back together, or that I have those feelings for Jason, there have been WAY too many things that have happened that has changed that. If he was feeling this way (which he claims he was...) for as long as he was, I wish he would of left before we had a child together. AGAIN, don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I don't wish I had Jonathan...I love him to pieces...I'm just saying I wish Jason would have left before, so I could have shared this special moment and time with someone who deserved it, and wanted to share it back.

At this point, I really want to thank the people who have supported me, and given me the hugs when I have needed them, and let me cry when I needed to, and of course, let me scream when I could no longer hold it in. You have made my life livable. I love you, and I appreciate each and everyone...mom, grandma, Cory, dad, Susan, Monica, Allie, Kim, Pastor Bob, Boss, Dawn, Niki, Cheryl and everyone else that I am forgetting...not because you're not important, but because I'm almost 30 and I have no memory left! Thank you...Thank you...Thank you...

Well, this has turned out a little longer than I had intended, but then again, I haven't blogged in about 2 months...soooooo, I had to make it worthwhile! I hope everyone is well...

ooooooold picture

2006-07-14T20:17:00.000-07:00

Ok, I've been getting some emails about this picture....it's old, from like 10 years ago...

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYONE

Old friends

2006-07-14T15:20:00.000-07:00

So, this past week an old friend got back in touch with me, which I was really excited about because this was one of the friends I really regretted losing touch with over the years. Found out he is now living in California and working at a children's home, which is awesome! Glad to be back in touch Clint...despite all of the torture you put me through...! ha!

comments...

2006-07-10T19:43:00.000-07:00

what happened to my comments??????? i LOATHE computers...

140

2006-07-09T19:51:00.000-07:00

This is my 140th post. It's hard to believe the past year or so of my life can be summed up in 140 posts...for number 140, I decided I should post something meaningful and important...

I want cake....preferrably chocolate.

happy

2006-07-08T16:59:00.000-07:00

New Links

2006-07-07T14:24:00.000-07:00

I've added a few new links...check them out...one is my friend Niki from Canada and her adorable blog about being a mom...and the other is a new blog from Jonathan...believe it or not, he has lots to say...

Hidden Treasure

2006-07-06T19:19:00.000-07:00

Great news....Jonathan has discovered his penis...!!!

Now for a lifetime of playing with it...I'll never have to buy him toys again...

Question

2006-07-03T12:53:00.000-07:00

In an attempt to get my body in shape after having a baby, I am looking for any suggestions you might have...a friend of mine suggested I do "Thyroid Yoga." Has anyone done this, or known of anyone who has gotten involved in this kind of workout? I am totally interested but don't know where to start... Fill me in people...

Freshman year...

2006-07-03T11:23:00.000-07:00

Ha, I found this picture from my Freshman year at Mount Vernon Nazarene University...I thought it was kinda funny...wow, almost 10 years ago...already...where does time go?

8 month boy

2006-06-30T15:05:00.000-07:00

I just can't believe how fast time flies by, on the 2nd Jonathan will be 8 months old. We had a great visit with daddy today...Jonathan even almost threw up on him...(that was a joke...) Also, Aunt Marissa who works at Toys R Us, filled us in on a little sale they are having and I got a BUNCH of great deals!!! Some outfits were only a dollar! Things like this make me smile...

As far as Jonathan goes, he is now getting his top two teeth in, they are starting to poke through, which has made for one cranky baby. But, he is still smiling when he can. I have caught him climbing up and standing in his crib twice already...I'm not sure if this is a fluke or what, but he is loving to pull himself up on things. I thought this happened when they were a little older?! Who knows...! Yesterday I was giving him a bath in the kitchen sink and he was not having that at all...he looked at me and starting yelling in a really angry tone! His little eyebrows were all furled (is that the right word?) and he stiffened his body up...it was cute. He has also been busy crawling and the other day he was crawling across the floor and before I knew it, he crawled right into the glass door to the patio...head first (obviously, how many babies do you know who learn to crawl feet first...duh)...he was trying to go outside I guess. It was so funny, he just sat there and stared at the glass like he didn't know what the heck was going on...it was just like in the movies when the "bad guys" hit the invisible force field and bounce off...ha.

Well, he is sleeping now, and I should try to get some things done before the big weekend...not that I have any plans...

Have a great weekend everyone, and a great Fourth of July...

I need to be better

2006-06-26T11:46:00.000-07:00

I have got to be better at taking pictures, getting them developed and getting them into the scrapbook that I haven't even started yet...oh yeah, and blogging...I'm so bad at it. OK! Of course, I don't have time right now, but I promise to get an update soon......Jonathan is doing so much I can hardly stand it...gosh...ok...

This is a horrible picture, but it's after one of our walks...This carrier is nice, but Jonathan has been liking the sling (from Niki!!) much better lately. He wasn't too sure about it at first, but now that he can sit up in it and look around he loves it. Still trying to figure out the other "positions" but we'll get it sooner or later...

Boo Hoo

2006-06-06T20:08:00.000-07:00

7 months

2006-06-06T14:56:00.000-07:00

My big boy turned 7 months old this past week. Every day he is starting to look more and more like a boy instead a baby! He looks a lot like Jason too...

This morning he was sitting in his crib (I propped him up while I was getting ready...) and he fell over and was on his tummy, then a few seconds late I looked at him again, and he was sitting up again! Crazy. I haven't had the time to download many pictures, but hopefully now that school is winding down I will get the chance to post some pictures...

Rolling...Rolling...Rolling...

2006-05-20T14:21:00.000-07:00

Jonathan has been very busy rolling and starting to crawl...He is now eating cereal and pears...we are going to start squash later today...um...yuck. He loves to be startled...and he loves to play peek-a-boo. This morning I woke up to him peeking over his crib bumper pad thing (what are those called?) making high pitch noises...I'm pretty sure he was trying to wake me up...he was smiling when I finally came over to the crib to get him, the little stinker. He has turned into quite a little flirt, and for some reason he likes the older women!

Only 3 more weeks left of school, I can hardly wait. This has been such a hard year, with the flood in my classroom at the beginning of the year, to the huge class size (we started out with 36 2nd graders I think...) to the difficult pregnancy, to bed rest, to the premature delivery, to the divorce...and now I'm just trying to make it to the end with a smile on my face. I have really grown to love SOME of my students...the others I am happy to send on to the next grade (sorry, is this bad??) It's just been a difficult year. A lot of major life changes in a short amount of time.

I am considering moving back home to Ohio. Not to get away from anything here, but to go back HOME where I belong. I've been wanting to move back for some time now, and Jason and I were considering the move back when we first found out we were having a baby. I have talked things over with him, I hate to leave him here because of the relationship with his son, but I just feel like this is something I truly need to consider. I don't want to raise a baby in the city, and plus, I just don't like it out here! Keep it in your prayers because it's not something I want to jump in to (although at this point I truly don't feel like I'm jumping, because I have been thinking about it for a year now...) and I want to do the right thing. The right thing for me and Jonathan, and Jason.

Hope all is well, I better go, Jonathan is finally sleeping. So now is my chance to get EVERYTHING done...can anyone relate??????? I just don't know how you mother's do it who stay home and have more than one child...you are amazing...

6 months

2006-04-30T00:43:00.000-07:00

Ok, so Tuesday Jonathan will be 6 months old. I can't believe it. This also means Jason and I have been seperated for almost 6 months, and divorced for one month. That is so crazy. So much has gone on. God isn't going to let the truth stay hidden, and that is all I'm going to say.

On another note, recently I went on a date. Yeah, I know. It was weird. I was nervous, and sweaty, and shaky, and it was fun! Not that I am looking to jump into anything serious, nor am I looking to date around either. I just went out and had fun, I had a good night. It is hard to think about because whoever I date, isn't only dating me, they are also dating Jonathan in a way. We are now a package deal. Although I had fun, I know I am not ready for this yet and I have decided to put dating aside for a little while longer. The man (who shall remain nameless) and Jonathan got a long well (yep, I brought the baby on a date!) It was very cute!

Well, it is entirely too late. I have no idea why I stay up so late these days...Have a great Sunday everyone!

Ya'all Say Paducah is a Hick Town...

2006-04-24T17:29:00.000-07:00

http://enews.earthlink.net/article/str?guid=20060424/444c4d40_3ca6_1552620060424416617326

And to think I used to live here...

Easter Shirt

2006-04-20T19:44:00.000-07:00

Funny Face

2006-04-14T19:06:00.000-07:00

This is one of the funniest faces I have seen him make...hilarious. We flew to Ohio today to visit family and friends. Jonathan did an awesome job on the plane...he has been so happy today!

Two front teeth

2006-04-07T12:34:00.000-07:00

Yep, all the sudden out of nowhere...two front bottom teeth...this kid is getting huge! I noticed it on Wednesday...no wonder he has been acting so strange...

A year ago today was when I found out I was pregnant with this beautiful boy...!

My boy

2006-04-03T21:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, I look a little crosseyed...but Jonathan is freaking adorable! Funny huh? Thanks Susan...this is an old picture of Jonathan, and I'm not quite sure when the one of me was taken...it's pretty old though as well!

Oh my

2006-03-27T22:16:00.000-07:00

Has it really been this long since I've blogged? So much has happened....ok...well, Jonathan is now a little over 13 pounds and just short of being 5 months old already!! Time goes by so fast! We are busy learning how to roll over, and "scoot" up and across the floor! Jonathan is such a good baby and almost always sleeps through the night. He also laughs at just about everything...! I love to hear him giggle, sometimes I swear he is actually saying "ha ha ha"!! It's hilarious! He has finally grown out of his 0-3 month clothes and is now such a big looking boy. Yeah...I think I love him...just look at that face...Don't you just want to smooooosh it???

Sick

2006-02-15T21:42:00.000-07:00

Jonathan is now 15 weeks old today! He has been to the doctor twice this week and has been diagnosed with Bronchiolitus. We came home with a nebulizer, and he does breathing treatments every 4 hours. It was so scary because he was having a hard time breathing, and it made him cough and hack, and sometimes it seemed like he wasn't ever going to start breathing again. But...the treatments seem to be helping and he isn't weezing or coughing as much. He is also a whopping 10 pounds and 15 ounces! woo hoo!

My dad came into town this week and it is the first time I have seen him in over 2 years, so it has been a nice little visit...!

Thank You

2006-02-09T17:58:00.000-07:00

I wanted to thank my good friends Andy and Niki Frew for the 2 beautiful slings and box of goodies you sent! (seriously, check out their site on my links area) You guys are awesome!

Also, thank you to Dawn Bosic for hooking me up with a crib, changing table, clothes and all that other fun stuff! I appreciate it very much!

Thank you to everyone who has helped make this transition into motherhood a little bit easier!

smile!

2006-02-04T08:47:00.000-07:00

Oh yeah

2006-02-03T19:38:00.002-07:00

Guess who's 13 weeks and has slept through the night for the past 4 nights??? Oh yeah...my little man!!!!!!!!!!

He is doing good and getting so fat! I love his little fat rolls on his legs. He has also started "talking" back when I talk to him...it is so funny because he looks like he is trying so hard to say something!

Yep, I love him.

West Side

2006-01-22T13:50:00.000-07:00

1/21/06

Quality time with Atticus

2006-01-17T22:42:00.000-07:00

Christmas Eve Pic

2006-01-17T22:40:00.000-07:00

Before and After

2006-01-13T23:09:00.000-07:00

Here is a before and after shot of Jonathan wearing the same shirt...(notice in the newer one it can't even be buttoned!) The "skinny" one was taken on 11/20 and the "chubby" one was taken today (1/13)

Who's your mama?

2006-01-13T20:22:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of me at 3 months, and Jonathan at 10 weeks...I think he's got my cheeks...and chin...

Back to School

2006-01-09T22:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, so it wasn't soooo bad...I only cried for half of the way to work. Not too bad. Jonathan did well at his daycare! He was the only kid there today so he got plenty of spoiling! On another note...welcome back Mrs. Turner...one of my students (remember I teach 2nd grade...) brought a knife to school today and threatened to stab a 1st grader. Oh, I've soooo missed teaching.

Praise God...

2006-01-04T12:34:00.000-07:00

from whom all blessings flow!

A wife of one of the pastors at church does at home daycare and has an opening for Jonathan! She only has 2 other kids, and charges about half of what the daycares out here charge! I'm so excited...and relieved!!!!

oh my gosh, he is 9 weeks old today! I will post pics later today!!!!!

traditions

2006-01-02T00:25:00.000-07:00

Every year for New Years Eve, Jason and I would get a bottle of wine and shrimp cocktail to toast in the New Year. Over the past 6 years we have saved the corks from all of our bottles of wine. It was weird not doing that this year.

I hope you have found the happiness you were looking for Jason, I hope you had a great New Years...you claimed you were just so miserable in our marriage, so I'm sure you had an awesome time wherever you chose to celebrate.

I have created a new New Years tradition...last night (or whenever it was...!) Jonathan and I popped open a bottle of Soy Formula and partied the night away! It was quite hilarious actually because he was so gassy he sounded like a little machine gun farting the way he was! I needed to laugh though, and it was the perfect evening...HAPPY 2006 EVERYONE!!

eh?

2005-12-29T20:39:00.000-07:00

After much deliberation, I've decided to convert to Canadism. Or maybe at least just go for a visit????

Jonathan

2005-12-27T08:21:00.000-07:00

Ok, so my posts have been somewhat depressing lately. No wonder people are so depressed during the holidays. I just wanted to write a bit about how much I love my son and how adorable he is. I just can't stare at him long enough! He is so precious, I just want to love him and hold him all day long! He is getting so big already and I can't wait to watch him become what God has created him to become. Sheesh...I love that kid...

12/25/05

2005-12-26T11:26:00.000-07:00

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!!!!

yesterday's post

2005-12-24T09:09:00.000-07:00

Guess I was a little "in the flesh..." but I meant every word I said. Don't mess with a post partum woman whose husband just left her...at Christmas.

A big THANK YOU

2005-12-23T17:16:00.000-07:00

I would like to take this time to thank everyone who has made it possible for Jason to walk out on Jonathan and I. You see, instead of holding him accountable for his actions, you have let him whine and cry about how miserable he is, and have enabled him to abandon his family.

To Jason's family: shame on you. You have hardly ever supported anything he has done, and now that he wants to WALK OUT on his wife and child, you have gladly handed him the money to do so. You didn't say "no Jason, you need to be a man and take care of your responsibilty...if you want to walk out get a job and do it yourself..." You handed him over the cash to do so. I guess I should be happy that my father in law has finally showed interest in his son though huh??? WHATEVER.

To the family at church who has fed and sheltered Jason through this time:
(Content deleted by the author)
Instead of holding Jason accountable in a Christian manner, you too have enabled him and given him the means to walk out on his family. Instead of backing off, and getting out of the situation like I asked you to, and like the pastor asked you too, you continually got involved and pushed Jason and I further apart. Shame on you.

To everyone else who is reading this and scratching their heads: On November 13th the day before we brought Jonathan home from the hospital (which all of those "happy" pictures are completely staged...) I received a text message on my phone from Jason that was supposed to be to another woman. Well, he accidentally sent it to my phone and it was about me. This in turn started a whole confrontation where Jason told me he didn't love me and didn't really ever love me and didn't want to be married anymore. So he moved out over a month ago and hasn't worked or supported Jonathan and I since. Yeah, and he is wanting to go into the ministry??!! I was very supportive, and tried my hardest to work on the marriage until
(content deleted by the author)
Sorry Jason, I'm not covering for you anymore. If you're going to make these decisions, you need to live by the consequences of these decisions...I'm not trying to make you look bad, you're doing a good enough job of that yourself.

As if bringing home a baby wasn't stressful enough....And by the way, I'm not keeping Jonathan from Jason for those of you who think I am...you see, Jason hasn't been completely honest with me in the past (when he has taken Jonathan before he was telling me where he was going, but lying about it...) and I don't trust him. I don't know where he is staying, or who he is staying with...he could be staying with a drug dealer or a child molester for all I know. I have told Jason he can see Jonathan whenever he wants...he just doesn't have a car seat or anything to take him in...so, he can come over here and see him whenever he wants...and until he gets things (His life...) under control visitation is on MY TERMS. I'm not letting anyone...ANYONE...take advantage of me.

7 weeks old...!!

2005-12-23T13:13:00.000-07:00

This was taken on Wednesday at 7 weeks old!

question

2005-12-14T11:40:00.000-07:00

I just found out my OBGYN is a lesbian...does that make me gay?

computers

2005-12-10T09:03:00.000-07:00

I wish I knew more about computers so I could add links and a photo album. Does anyone have any suggestions for a good photo album I could use? A free service would be nice!!! I LOATHE computers...! I just finally figured out how to use Photo Story, and I have made some really cute slide shows, but I can't figure out if ther is a way to publish them on here or not...I need a major computer intervention session...

Oh yeah...

2005-12-10T08:54:00.000-07:00

It has just occured to me (well, someone requested..) that I never posted a preggo picture from my last days of the pregnancy...of course the delivery happened so fast I didn't get one from my last week, but I have one from 33 weeks (I delivered in between 34 and 35 weeks...) soooo....here it is...(me with my mom and Grandma Charlotte...)

sling site

2005-12-08T11:11:00.000-07:00

www.coastalsling.com

my friend Niki makes and sells these awesome slings! hope you don't mind Niki...wanted to get you some buisness down here...! i need to order one!

12/6/05

2005-12-06T11:23:00.000-07:00

Hello...

Ok, so I didn't know how much work being a mother really is. Yesterday Jonathan and I had our first outting alone together. I felt like I was having to pack for a 2 day trip. I still don't know exactly how to pack a diaper bag, like how much stuff to take. I seem to overpack a bit. It was fun though, we went to the mall and we walked around until my brother went on his lunch break (He works at Robinson's May) and then we had lunch with him. He is such a proud uncle! He was showing Jonathan off to everyone! It was so cute.

Jonathan also had another Dr. appt. yesterday because last week the doctor detected a heart murmur, and she wanted to recheck it this week to see whether or not Jonathan would have to go to a cardiologist...thankfully though she didn't hear it yesterday. She said that is quite common with infants. Also, Jonathan hit the 7 pound mark! 7 pounds and 3/4 ounces. He is so chubby! I love it.

So, the time of me having to go back to work is quickly approaching. I'm crushed. I don't want to go back. I have no idea what I'm going to do with Jonathan when I go back. I have to go back to work, there is no way around that. I've called a few day care centers (which I HATE the thought of leaving him at one...) but they are either filled to capacity, scary looking or really expensive. Some day cares are like 200+ dollars a week! It's crazy. I'm hoping someone from church will offer to take care of him or something. Maybe I'll just hide him in my desk at work. Please keep this issue in your prayers, I don't want to make the wrong decision.

more pics

2005-12-04T19:04:00.000-07:00

Jonathan chilling with Uncle Cory. Me and Jonathan. Family Pic...

4 weeks old today!

2005-11-30T20:40:00.000-07:00

Jonathan: Don't look, but there is a MONSTER behind you...

Dr. Appt.

2005-11-28T19:22:00.000-07:00

Jonathan had another dr. appt. today and he weighs 6 pounds 3 1/4 oz!! He is getting so big! Ok, so he is still pretty small...I know.

question...

2005-11-27T18:44:00.000-07:00

Why is my blog so screwed up? I hate computers...

Church

2005-11-27T18:39:00.000-07:00

Today was Jonathan's first church service. I felt very uneasy leaving him in the nursery still being so little, so I kept him with me. I must admit I had a hard time paying attention to the message today, because I couldn't stop staring at my beautiful son. I just could help but look at him, and pray for him that this would be the "start" of his "spiritual life." I prayed that I would be a good Christian mom, and model to Jonathan what it means to live in Christ. I just want God to give me the strength and wisdom to be the parent He wants me to be.

handsome boy

2005-11-27T00:25:00.000-07:00

What a cutie. 11/25/2005

saturday

2005-11-27T00:20:00.000-07:00

i couldn't think of a witty title, sorry.

not much new has been going on here. but i just wanted to update you on things. jonathan is doing good, he had is circumcision on tuesday, and he is healing nicely...although he is very cranky! he weighed 5 pounds 5 ounces too! he is starting to get chubby, so that's nice! my grandma charlotte came out from ohio to help with things, and she left today after being here for 3 weeks. it was nice to have her here, thanks gg!

jason and i are going through some things, please keep us in your prayers.

thanks

Check it out

2005-11-25T11:54:00.000-07:00

http://www.azcentral.com/arizonarepublic/arizonaliving/articles/1124quads1124.html

Please keep them in your prayers

Thanksgiving

2005-11-24T01:20:00.000-07:00

I hope everyone enjoys a wonderful Thanksgiving with their families and friends!

Have a wonderful day!

The Roberts Family

2005-11-23T21:12:00.000-07:00

It seems like everytime I think my problems couldn't get any worse, I always hear about someone else whose needs are greater than mine.

Phil and Lisa Roberts posted on their site today that their infant daughter Emily passed away today. Please keep them in your prayers.

www.expandingrobertses.com

Oh yeah, I forgot...

2005-11-19T23:06:00.000-07:00

Jonathan had his first Dr. appt. on Friday. He is now 5 pounds and 1 ounce, and 18 1/2 inches long! He is getting big!

A big thanks to Jason for staying up with him last night...he almost made it all night...ha ha...
It was very nice to get a few extra hours of sleep! Thank you Jason, I love you!

Please keep praying for the Roberts family (the family of quads we met while Jonathan was in the NICU) Phil does a good job at keeping his site updated so people know how to pray specifically for their needs, so check it every now and then please!!!!!!

www.expandingrobertses.com

O...H...I...O!!!!

2005-11-19T18:03:00.000-07:00

Go Buckeyes!!!

Bath Time

2005-11-18T03:30:00.000-07:00

And that ain't bath water...

coming home~

2005-11-17T18:34:00.000-07:00

Leaving the NICU!

11/14/2005

So far, so good

2005-11-16T23:12:00.000-07:00

Well, it's been two nights, and so far nothing traumatic has happened...however...I do have a few stats for the experience...

The number of hours I slept the first night we brought Jonathan home: 0

The number of times I've been peed on: 3

The number of times I've been pooped on: 1

The number of times I've seen explosive diahrreah: 5 times (in one hour...)

The number of times I've had to ask my mom or grandma for help: I lost count after 978

The number of hours I slept the second night after we brought Jonathan home: 2

The things I DON'T miss about pregnancy: constant morning sickness, constant trips to the potty, peeing my pants when I sneeze, not being able to get comfortable, not being able to keep any food down, nausea (oh wait, have I said that one already?), swollen ankles and hands, being sick after eating...

What I think about when I look at Jonathan: I just can't wait to do this all over again!!

Prayer request

2005-11-15T00:27:00.000-07:00

While in the NICU we met a christian couple from Georgia with quadruplets. You can read their story on their website...please keep them in your prayers...

http://expandingrobertses.com/

He's home!!!

2005-11-15T00:01:00.000-07:00

That's all I have to say about that!!

The scary news I got today...

2005-11-14T15:15:00.000-07:00

JONATHAN IS COMING HOME....TONIGHT!!!!

what do i do with him when he gets here????

YIKES

Jonathan's thoughts on suppositories:

2005-11-12T11:48:00.000-07:00

Not too fond of them.

update

2005-11-12T11:46:00.000-07:00

yesterday was a much better visit with jonathan! when i got to the hospital i noticed his iv was taken out! he was also wearing one of the outfits his grandma monica bought for him, which was the first time he has been able to really wear real clothes! by his 2:00 feeding he was also moved to a "big boy bed" (an open crib) and he seemed to like that much better. hearing test came back good, bilirubin...good, breastfeeding for the first time...weird, but good, he seemed to get the hang of it pretty quick. now his main job is to eat everything on his own. he is really good for about 2 or 3 feedings a day, but then poops out and won't even try the rest of the day...grrrr...so they end up having to feed him through his NG tube. well, i better go, we're getting ready to go visit him now!!!!!

update

2005-11-10T19:41:00.000-07:00

Today was a little frustrating after leaving the hospital. Yesterday I was told that Jonathan would be put in a "big boy bed" (an open crib) and that his IV would be taken out today. But after the nurse practitioner examined him she decided he wasn't ready yet. In fact, she ordered another bilirubin test be done because he is looking jaundiced again. He hasn't nippled anything in awhile, he just isn't interested. He did so well for about a day and a half, and now he just doesn't even try, so they end up feeding him through his NG tube instead. I do get to try a breastfeed him tomorrow though! I am very excited about that. Maybe he is just a boob man and will pick that up right away!

He just seems to be very tired of working so hard. He just isn't interested in anything except sleeping right now...

Our family

2005-11-09T23:02:00.000-07:00

Jonathan is one week old today!

that's my boy!

2005-11-08T15:20:00.000-07:00

Grandma took me to the hospital early today and I got to do Jonathan's morning feedings! He has now eaten all of his bottles since yesterday at 8:30 p.m.! He is getting the hang of it and the doctor has decided to increase his feeding to 9 cc's from 5 cc's! His bilirubin (sp?) was also checked again, and it is now at a normal level, so he no longer has to wear his "bili-blanket" (which made him glow a nice green/blue color and made him look like a little glo-worm!!!) The doctor also wants to try Jonathan in an open bassinet (he is now in a covered one because he can't regulate his body temperature) probably starting tomorrow. He is doing much better, and the doctor predicted that it shouldn't be more than a week before he can come home...maybe even less!!!! Now we are just waiting for that first poop! I never thought I would be so excited about poop before! Thank you all for your prayers!

The details...

2005-11-07T21:13:00.000-07:00

Ok, I said I would post details later and many have been asking for them...so here they are! On Friday the 28th I woke up with a fever and high blood pressure. When I called the doctor, she told me to go to the hospital, after they ran some labs I was then admitted to do a 24 hour test. We got the results on Sunday the 30th, which said I had preclampsia. The doctor was trying to decide on whether or not to put me on complete bed rest or to go ahead and induce labor. On Monday they decided to induce labor, which progressed very slowly. They wanted to wait until I was at least 35 weeks (which was Wednesday the 2nd) and then they broke my water at 7:15 am. After a long, hard day of labor without results I started to spike a fever around 10:00 p.m. and so my doctor decided to do a cesarean. Jonathan was born at 10:33 p.m. and they realized his lungs were not fully developed. So, unable to breathe on his own, they admitted him into Phoenix Children's Hospital NICU. His goals are to start breathing on his own, to begin to eat on his own, and to gain weight. Then he will be able to come home. They took him off of his oxygen today and they began to try and feed him yesterday. He is not doing very well with the whole bottle thing. He isn't organized enough to breathe, suck, and swallow at the same time, but he is working very hard at it. What he doesn't eat from the bottle, they feed him through a tube, so he should start gaining weight soon! Thanks again for all your prayers!

Jonathan David

2005-11-07T21:01:00.000-07:00

This is from when we went to visit him today! I got to feed him his bottle (which he still isn't doing very well!) and change his diaper...which brought me so much joy! He is off of his oxygen for the time being, but they might have to put him back on it because his heart rate keeps dropping. I just love this guy.

Welcome to the planet

2005-11-06T14:50:00.000-07:00

Weighing in at 4 pounds and 9 ounces...Jonathan David is here! Born on November 2nd at 10:33 pm. More details later...mom and baby are doing well. Jonathan is still in the NICU and I was just discharged today...thanks for your prayers and support!

Day 2

2005-10-25T15:56:00.000-07:00

Day 2 of bed rest and I'm getting a little antsy.

"I'm a big piece of poop"

2005-10-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2005-10-20-mr-floatie_x.htm

It's like summer break...without the paycheck

2005-10-21T16:48:00.000-07:00

Well, my doctor has put me on bedrest. Not completely, but sorta. I'm not allowed to work, and I need to stay off my feet...Anyway...my blood pressure is still high and on Tuesday when I went in to the doctor I started having contractions and the doctor needed to give me that crazy shot again! Man, this little guy must really want to come out! So, it will be nice to have some time to relax, however, Jason is now having to quit school (again...) and get more work somewhere. So, pray something works out with that. We are a little bummed because we were hoping that I could at least hold out until the end of his semester, but God has other plans...and that is ok with us. On top of that, Jason got into an accident yesterday, I won't get into the details, but everyone was ok. It was just really bad timing (is there ever good timing for an accident?!) I hate to say it because it is so cliche but why does everything bad have to happen all at once?!

Jonathan David

2005-10-20T18:58:00.000-07:00

Another picture of our son, Jonathan David Turner, and yes, that is our final decision!

LADIES:

2005-10-15T22:14:00.000-07:00

Let's talk breast pumps....

please give me your input, ideas and anything else....

huge

2005-10-06T19:51:00.000-07:00

I feel like a big, fat, hot air balloon.

The Name Game

2005-10-03T15:21:00.000-07:00

Ok, so we were going to go with David Elijah for a name, but now I'm not so sure. I'm so indecisive about this. I'm afraid I won't like whatever name we chose later in life. Or I like about 15 names, but can't seem to fit them all into one name that sounds good...besides it's never a good thing to give a child 8 middle names.

Health is good, blood pressure is coming down. I think the nurse at school didn't know how to take blood pressure, or maybe her blood pressure cuff was broken because everytime she took it, my blood pressure read soooo high. But, everytime I took my blood pressure somewhere else it was about normal. So, who knows. Thank you for your prayers. I am getting a home blood pressure cuff that hooks up to my phone line that will send the readings straight to the nurse though, so that will be a little more comforting for everyone.

I can't believe it's October already. Time is going by so much faster than I thought it would. It's hard for me to believe that I'm due in 2 months. Actually, it might be sooner than that. Baby Turner is measuring about 3 weeks bigger than he should be (which has me scratching my head...) so I have another ultrasound scheduled for the 18th and depending on what the doctor sees there, she might change my due date earlier...yikes.

September 25th

2005-09-26T11:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was our 6th anniversary. I know compared to some couples that doesn't seem like much, but I can't believe how much time has gone by already! Time really does go fast.

My doctor is concerned because my blood pressure is high. Friday she hooked me up to the baby monitor and everything with the baby looked good, however, she is still concerned because my blood pressure seems to be high during school (I teach 2nd grade...yeah, a bit stressful!) So, if it doesn't get better she is putting me on bed rest. For those who pray, please pray that my blood pressure levels out and everything will be ok. I go back in today for another check up, so I will have more information this afternoon.

Cold Front

2005-09-15T20:29:00.000-07:00

It's finally cooling down out here, today it only reached 98 degrees. I almost had to get my sweater out...

My evening

2005-09-13T08:35:00.000-07:00

I spent yesterday evening in the hospital. It was interesting. I was having contractions (which I just thought were "weird pains") so my doctor told me to go to the hospital. After getting slightly FREAKED out, I was given some meds to stop the contractions, which made me feel like I just drank a Venti Caramel Frappachino with 3 extra shots of expresso. I felt like sprinting through the halls of the maternity ward. They also did some tests to see if I had preclampsia because my blood pressure was high and my feet and legs were swollen. But everything came back good. Sooo, nothing to worry about. But, I took the day off school anyway to sit with my feet up and to sip on some ice water...I feel good about staying home, but I still hate leaving my students with a sub....

A Flatter Bladder is Gladder

2005-09-09T22:32:00.000-07:00

What the heck? I have to pee like every 20 minutes...and I'm not exaggerating.

I had my monthly dr. appointment today and I am 27 weeks now...sheesh...BUT the doctor said I was measuring at 29 weeks....yikes. She didn't change the due date, she is going to wait and see what I look like next month...wow, changing the date by 2 weeks would mean that I would be due around...THANKSGIVING.

It's probably just a fluke thing...

Cravings

2005-09-01T18:05:00.000-07:00

My latest and really only pregnancy craving...

BEER

Just a reminder...

2005-08-28T18:50:00.000-07:00

...of what we all have to look forward too...!! David Elijah...COMING SOON...December 8th!

BRING IT ON

2005-08-28T18:39:00.000-07:00

Go ahead...I'm not afraid....my pregnancy is going too good....

Bring on the hemorrhoids....I'm not afraid